'The Loved Ones' (2009)

Why I took so long to watch 'The Loved Ones'

I knew someone from Twilight was in it. I am not an ignorant Twilight hater. I vowed never to watch nor read Twilight, and then a friend somehow wangled me into watching 3 of the Twilight movies... And I have my opinion intact, I wish I could have those hours back but then again at least I am dislike them when at least having seen some of them.

I kept hearing generally rather splendid things about it but the Twilight-ness of it kept putting me off, then I sort of forgot about the Twilight-related-ness because so much time had went by from when I first heard about it to getting round to picking it up on blu-ray. Time as in years, literally 3-4 years.

What have I learned about a random shitty reason like that putting me off watching a movie...? Don't listen to myself going "Eurgh that's the dude from.... (insert a crappy movie here)"

Similar happened when said friend who made me watch Twilight was watching a movie I picked one evening for us to watch... 'Dread'. I'm glad, because I like that movie, that I didn't know, and she pointed out to me that, some other dude from Twilight is the lead. Had I known that going in, perhaps I would never had picked up the Clive Barker 3-pack with 'Dread' in it.

Another reason I eventually got my ass to see it? It appeared on a few Top 10 lists last year on horror sites... which made me remember this movie from years back and be all... "how is it on a 2012 list?" I figure it took years to hit America, just like Mandy Lane.

Back to 'The Loved Ones' however... Dayum I wish I'd bothered my ass to watch it sooner.

I do not love the movie as a whole entity but there are key scenes and moments that for a horror fan you have to see. I was saddened that there was parts of the movie I just didn't care about, since after I picked it up my family got to watch it before me and preceded to hype the shit out of it for me. I don't take kindly to that, I try to keep my expectations low so I'm not disappointed.


A plus point for me not loving the entire movie is that the running time is small, so it whacks by quick through the character development. Please don't take that as all I'm interested in is "kills" and "gore".

I love the Saw franchise but I love it for the characters not just the traps.

Fact is with 'The Loved Ones' I didn't like the lead. The guy rubbed me the wrong way but credit to them finding my humanity, when the shit goes down I sort of felt sorry for the guy. Sort of. Ok, more accurately I thought about what it would be like for me to go through what he went through. So its close enough as we are gonna get to me caring for the dude.

The sub-plot, I get why it is there. We need a break from the torture, the gore. We are shown what Brent would be doing if he went to his Prom... but I just didn't care about his friend and his date... Maybe I am just here for the gore...??

He killed his father in a car accident, and is a boring moody emo son of a bitch.

I actually liked the killers... shocker! We never glorify the killers in horror films...

Anyone else think their wallpaper looks like the carpet from 'The Shining'? Just a random thought.

Ok back to that sub-plot... Lola kidnapped and tortured Brent's friends dates brother... and he was the dude that Brent almost ran over which caused the car accident that killed his father. Guess that connects everyone in the movie. Still, I don't care... but damn if I'm sort of talking myself into liking the sub-plot... but when watching it I didn't like it, so there. I like Princess Lola.

So the sequences I loved in this, and loved in such a way I have not been able to go back and re-watch as it was so painful to watch... this is a compliment, honest... is everything that happens from when Brent is tortured inside Lola's home. 

Lola asks him out to prom, he says no, and she is not exactly taking rejection too well.

The movie becomes very claustrophobic when we are inside her house, and I was inclined to think he would never leave, movie endings being bummers as they tend to be now.

The physical torture with nails and a drill is fraking fantastically shot, with, for me, the right amount of humour. I need humour in my horror, it breaks the tension, gives that release that the horrific images and stunning sound design in this movie build up. 

Rating - I've seen it once and I don't think I can rate it yet. It needs to settle. It's damn good and I recommend it. That's all I got folks. 

Hasta Luego

@Fake_Shemp

The Artist (2011)

The lives of George Valentin and Peppy Miller cross, as one descends into obscurity from stardom and the other embraces the new technology of talkies to become a star.

I believe this deserves its spot on the Top 250. The Artist is beautifully made, the score by Ludovic Bource is authentic, light in places, playful but also deep and emotional. I will admit I had not came across any of his work prior to this movie, but I hope he goes on to a great many movies, as he was awarded Breakout Composer of the Year 2011.

There is some controversy about his use of the Vertigo score, but the Director Michel Hazanavicius has stated in defence of the use of the Vertigo score,

"'The Artist' was made as a love letter to cinema, and grew out of my (and all of my cast and crew's) admiration and respect for movies throughout history," Hazanavicius responded in a statement. "It was inspired by the work of Hitchcock, (Fritz) Lang, (John) Ford, (Ernst) Lubitsch, (F.W.) Murnau and (Billy) Wilder. I love Bernard Herrmann and his music has been used in many different films and I'm very pleased to have it in mine. I respect Kim Novak greatly, and I'm sorry to hear she disagrees."

I guess its like how you borrow from family, you never steal. (Unless you are some inbred on the Jeremy Kyle Show with little to no teeth...) The music is used with respect and love of film, it's a compliment to it.

On my first viewing of this, I honestly didn't know what to expect. I had somehow convinced my sister to go along to see it, without giving her any details, knowing she would have said no if she knew it was 1. Black and White. and 2. A silent movie.

But big surprise, she loved it. As did I.

Paraphrasing her... she loved it because its an old style movie but made today, so the actors actually know how to act. When he's "mugging" to the camera in the movies within movie, its self aware, Jean Dujardin is aware that he is overacting as George Valentin within the movie in the movie.

I simply fell for George Valentin in much the same way I love Gene Kelly.

Yes, I went through a phase as a teen when I watched a lot of 1930s/40s/50s Hollywood musicals. Yeah I'm so uncool and I'm cool with that.

Both men have a gracefulness to them, especially in the way they dance. I find it very masculine, very athletic and that's partly down to even the clothing Gene Kelly chose to wear. He would dress like a regular guy but smart. Agree or disagree, I think he's a mighty fine man.

George Valentin is also such a masculine figure to me, yet he is his own tragic downfall. His stubbornness, his inability to see the new technology of "talkies" as a way to expand cinema. His unwillingness to embrace change. All factors in his descent, which is rather beautifully shown around 36 minutes into the movie in a scene where George Valentin runs into Peppy Miller. This scene is pure show don't tell, heck the whole film is show don't tell. this staircase is in the central atrium of the Bradbury Building located at 304 South Broadway, Los Angeles, California. Dozens of movies, TV shows, and music videos have been filmed there. Most notably, the interior and exterior were featured prominently in 'Blade Runner'. So even the use of this location has Hollywood engrained into it.

But boy that dance scene which is said to have taken 5 months of rehearsal  in the same studio Gene Kelly and Debbie Reynolds used for 'Singin' in the Rain'. "It was really hard," remembers Bérénice Bejo, "and even now when I look at the movie I can't believe how fast we're doing it. Sometimes it's like my feet still hurt."

It's authenticity is down to how the movie is shot in 1.33:1 ratio because as the director Michel Hazanavicius states it gives the actors "a presence, a power, a strength. They occupy all the space of the screen.", using only shots that could have been used back between 1927-1932 so there is no zoom shots and the wipes used between scenes are also authentic.

The Artist was shot with 22 FPS, so when it is played at the standard 24 FPS, the actors movement becomes faster, not so noticeable but it's effective. This was used to mirror how most silent films were shot with 14 to 24 FPS, which makes many of these films appear "faster" in motion when played on modern projection equipment at 24 FPS.

The titles and credits being fashioned after movies in the 20s and 30s also add to its reallness of being a silent movie.

There's a scene where George Valentin is watching on a home projector one of his movies, where he plays a swashbuckler. The movie is in fact 'The Mark of Zorro' but instead of Douglas Fairbanks, our protagonist is substituted for him.

In short, heh, this is made with love for it's subject, and is an emotional character study and romantic piece. Please if you let the black and whiteness or the silentness of this put you off in any way...don't, recommended hewl yeah! :D



Rating - 6 Baby!

Hasta Luego
@Fake_Shemp

Christopher Guest-a-thon

This Is Spinal Tap

Favourite moments

-Goes up to 11

-The IMDb rating on this movie also goes up to 11, go check it out for yourself.

-The sustain on the guitar you would hear if it was playing

-Derek Smalls getting stuck in the pod for the majority of a song

-Derek Smalls getting out of the pod at the end of the song just as Nigel and David get back into the pod.

-Mick Shrimpton being happy to do without the rock and roll, as long as there is still sex and drugs

-Nigel wondering what the hours of a fictional job in a shoe shop are

-Gold and Miniature golf... the holes are smaller

-Elvis Presley's grave sing song

-Boston not being a college town

-Nigel unable to get back up from his big guitar pose

-It being a hard task to find mandolin strings in Austin

-Getting sued by a record label for "lack of talent"

-How are you supposed to sign your name on a record that is completely black?

Wating For Guffman

Favourite Moments

-The 'Remains of the Day' lunchbox

-Auditioning with a scene from 'Raging Bull'

-Not being the class clown but sitting beside him and taking notes

-Not being allowed to wear glasses during 'Covered Wagons' because its not historically accurate

-Sheila weird bangs

-Considering the Mississippi river a coast

-That old joke about how many babies fit in a tire, its a zen thing

-'Less is More' acting

-Corky getting refused money for the play, and going home in a rage to bite his pillow

-Having a potluck dinner on the alien spaceship that landed

-Libby grilling a single chicken wing

-Come to the Dairy Queen for a coke if you are thirsty

-The temperature inside the crop circle is always 67 degrees with a 40% chance of rain.

-Midnight at the Oasis

-There are 5 letters in the word 'Blaine'

-Mix up the letters of 'Blaine' and you get 'Nebali', which of course is the planet the aliens come from.

-Ron always having to explain to his wife who he is doing impressions of.

-Libby singing 'Teacher's Pet'

-Blaine - Stool Capital of the World

-The way Corky says "Everybody Dance"

-Ron getting Sheila to do his hair before the performance, and then he is wearing a hat.

-Finding the Chinese restaurant via a huge neon sign.

Best in Show

Favourite Moments

-Naming nuts

-If you get tired, pull over, if you get hungry, eat something.

-Losing the Bee toy

-Cookie and Gerrys good credit card

-Cookie has until two notices to pay the credit card

-Gerry asking if the hotel takes travellers cheques, which they do, but he doesn't have any travelers cheques.

-Sheri and her husband both loving soup

-Sheri always having things to talk or not talk about with her husband, and still finding things to not talk about.

-Everyone loves a terrier

-Everywhere Cookie and Gerry go, Cookie meets some guy she's slept with

-Gerrys literal two left feet

-The Swans meeting at Starbucks's that were across the street from one another

-Hamilton's sweaters

-Being lucky to be raised amongst catalogues

-6"4, where are you from? Norland?

-Scott wanting to hold a meat stick

-Scott and Stefan packing lots of Kimonos

-Don't water plants, they're plastic

A Mighty Wind

Favourite Moments

- Thank God for model trains because otherwise where would the idea for big trains come from?

-Mitch wanting to see the model train town in the autumn.

-The Main Street Singers starting their set with the song The Folksmen were going to sing

-No hole in the middle of The Folksmen records

-Amber's "humming"

-Ambers smiling face in the background of the press conference

-Mitch and Mickey "you rock" "you rock my world"

-Mark Shubb becoming a woman

-The way Jerry sings "theres a star on the horizon" during "A Mighty Wind"

-Lauries story of how she did Porn

-Sissy being "on the streets"

- The Witches in Natures Color

-Diane Delano being one of the members of WINC in the cutaway

-Mike's shit catchphrases from his old tv show

-Sure Flo

-Can we get a crane?

-Ed Begley Jr.

-The musical nature of Terrys childhood trauma

-Terry getting sent to bed with nothing but dessert

-Retro/Nowtro

-Doubling

-The names of The Folksmen's albums

-The Folksmen's albums only being printed in two colours

-Real furniture or rehersal furniture

-Irving worried about the plants in the lobby

-Naomi Steinblooms reactions to the songs 

-Lawrence slapping Irving

-Mike LaFontain's hair

-Mike coming up with shit ideas for new tv shows featuring the New Mainstreet singers

-Sean being sick of wearing his New Mainstreet Singer costume

-Elliot Steinblooms hatred for folk music 

-Alan leaving the map at home.

-All of Mitches album covers post Mitch and Mickey breakup

-Cake/Frosting

-Mitch took a bus

-The kiss at the end of the rainbow

For Your Consideration

Favourite Moments

-The Oscar buzz

-The drawing of Rachel as a child on the nightstand

-Changing the name of the movie

-The internet is the one with emal

-Whitney's hair not being naturally blonde

-Morley making time for his important clients

-Victor on the TRL type show

-Drunk Marilyn post oscar nominations

-Throwing the script on the floor

-Whitney being reminded of her family, that she hates, by the posters of "Home for Purim" 

-Whitney liking the posters for the movie to be misleading

-Hula balls

-Auditioning for commercials

-Fred Willards hair

-Marilyn's facelift

-Paper Badge

-The french movie being nominated, whats with that? She's not even legal

-The interviewer who never lets the writers answer

-Sarah Shahi 

-No Penis Intended

-Callie telling Brian he's not confused sexually

-Corey's native american blood 

-Whitney hurting her back by falling over the side of an escalator

-Marilyn's acting class

-Was the difference "its louder?"

-Brian getting the Oscar nomination

-Jay wanting the set to be lit like a stadium

Each viewing of these movies makes me love them more, and see some other small thing one of the actors will do that cracks me up.

What are your favourite moments from Christopher Guest movies?







Hasta Luego
@Fake_Shemp

Django Unchained (2012)

I know I don't go in for Awards Ceremonies  that is unless its for a movie I like. Then it should win everything and the award matters.

Heres what 'Django Unchained' has been nominated for.

Best Picture
Best Supporting Actor, Christoph Waltz
Best Original Screenplay
Best Cinematography
Best Sound Editing


What it's won thus far....This way to IMDb

It was superb! This needs to win 'Best Original Screenplay' (which sounds odd when you take into consideration how QT pulls in his insperation, but there's nobody who writes his unique way)




If anyone can spare $300 I'd like one of these....Spare $600 and let me have Django and Schultz.

Why is it so good?

The script.

Characters are well defined, given lots to do, lots of goals. Django has a clear goal, to get his wife back.

Obstacles are put in his way, and he grows as a character, as a man, learning along the way skills that will help him achieve his goal.

QT's movies can be almost 3 hours and not feel it because with every dialogue heavy scene, tension builds under the surface, tension that hints at major shit about to kick off. As a viewer I'm kept waiting in anticipation and when it comes, when the big gun fight, the deaths are delivered they are more than worth the wait. They are better for the wait.

When you think its over, there's more awesomness to come.

And damn if QT doesn't know how to write instant classic lines.

I'd saw the trailer once online previous to seeing the trailer in the cinema when I was with my sister, she looked to me "Huh? How are you quoting it already?" and by the time I saw the movie, I had more lines memorized.

And then there is the...

Acting.

The actors capture you into their world, the world of "The Southern".

Jamie Foxx as Django grows so much over the course of this movie. He is such a physical actor, his whole demeanour changes as he overcomes obstacles, is given worth and freedom.

Christoph Waltz's portrayal as Schultz makes me want to re-watch this movie immediately, if not sooner. He is so disgusted by slavery that it is him that sets the entire movie in motion. He is so polite, a stranger in a strange land, yet there is something under the surface that tells you he can handle his shit, that he may be polite but it does not mean he is not the most dangerous man in the room.

I think Christoph Waltz is my new love.

Leo DiCaprio is a scene stealer, and stealing it from him is Sam Jackson. The two of them leap out the screen, grab you by the collar and make you take notice.
























Rating - 6

Hasta Luego
-Fake Shemp-

Stand By Me (1986)

This movie will be forever a part of the Corey trilogy, well my own personal Corey Feldman trilogy.

The Lost Boys and The Goonies, being the other respectably. (now if I only had time this week to watch those as well as this. I'll try and give them a viewing over the weekend, although generally having one day off a week does not lend itself to movie watching. I think I have done splendid for all the time I've been at work.

When I watched this on I watched the BD. I already have it on DVD but when they released this, one of my favourite movies (I have a lot of favourite movies but when you take into account the amount of movies out there, it's not many) on BD with a new Picture-in-Picture commentary I had to pick it up. If The Goonies Picture-in-Picture commentary was anything to go by, I had to. Had. To.

The BD also has on it the previous audio commentary from director Rob Reiner. I've read some people finding his commentaries boring, but I really enjoyed it.

I do find however on the new commentary featuring him, Corey Feldman and Wil Wheaton, that Rob tends to talk over the other guys a tad. Not too bad but Wil Wheaton starts a few stories, that I for one would like to hear through to completion, and he is cut off by Rob.

Its still a great commentary and look back at the movie that is Rob Reiner's favourite movie of his, and admittedly the best thing the other two actors have done, and at such an early age.

And yes I've watched this 25th retrospective commentary twice since I bought the BD.

I really enjoy commentaries, documentaries, general supplements on releases that are anniversary editions... or re-released many years after the movie initially came out.

Why?

Its the reflective nature, the honesty, the stories.

Rather than normal commentaries which I suppose are mostly recorded just as, or just before a movie is released. There is no time for the makers to reflect upon their work.

As for the movie itself, what makes it so special?

It is rare.

A Stephen King adaptation that is good.

This stands up there, for me, with the other great adaptations.... 'The Shawshank Redemption', 'Green Mile', 'Misery' (also  a Rob Reiner film), 'The Shinning' (the Kubrick one of course)

I like the bad ones, 'The Stand', 'The Langoliers', 'Thinner', 'Sometimes They Come Back(Again/For More) 'The Shinning' (the bad mini-series one)


It captures something, youth, innocence, a special period in time in America. A time that if I had a working TARDIS I would like to go back and visit, small town America in the summer, and sit outside a small cafe and eat ice cream.

The movie is narrated by the adult Gordie (Richard Dreyfuss) as he retells the time when he and his 3 friends set out to find the body of a boy, Ray Brower, who his friend, Vern, overheard his brother saying he found the body of whilst dumping a car.

Verne's brother and his set of friends could not come forward, and end the search for the boys body, which had been big news in their small town of Castle Rock.





There was something so perfect about the casting of the 4 leads.

Gordie Lachance played by Wil Wheaton was already a geeky awkward quiet teen.

Chris Chambers played by River Phoenix was wise beyond his years and it has been said he was like a father to some of the other teens on set.

Vern Tessio played by Jerry O'Connell was said to be the funniest guy some had met before or since.

Teddy Duchamp played by Corey Feldman was perfect for the role also, having an awful relationship with his own parents and being a very aggressive angry teen.


All the boys reflected their on screen characters and their endings in the movie is rather appropriate in real life too.

Gordie as did Wil became a writer.

Chris as did River died at an early age. (A quick google search and you can see the picture of him in his coffin, I didn't have the heart to post it. I want to remember him alive, for his work.)

Vern at the end finds a penny, his luck has changed. His character marries straight out of highschool and has lots of kids. Actor Jerry married Rebecca Romijn

Teddy tried to join the army but was kept out by his bad eyesight and injury (by his own father) to his ear. He stays around Castle Rock doing odd jobs... well thats the B-Movie and musical career of Corey.

I will always remember them for this movie.


Rating - 6



Hasta Luego
-Fake Shemp-

Life of Pi (2012)

Life of Pi (2012)

Where Chuck Nolan had Wilson, Pi has Richard Parker...

 'Life of Pi' tells the story of a man named after a french swimming pool, but because of bullies he shortens his name to just Pi. He grows up within a family that runs a zoo, until they have to move to Canada and sell off the animals.

On their way to Canada, taking with them some animals to sell, the ship they are travelling on gets into a storm and sinks, leaving Pi stranded in the ocean with some animals, most notably a tiger called Richard Parker for company.

The movie is in one word... Beautiful.

To those that have not read the book, I am one of them, that's what it is... a story.

The older Pi, now living in Canada is retelling this story to a writer who is out of ideas for his new book, having just thrown away the last two years of work he had been writing.

By the end Pi tells the young writer that once he was back on land, safe and recovering in hospital that two men working for an insurance company visited him. They want to know how it all went down, literally, why the ship sank. And how Pi survived.

Pi goes on to tell them the story we have been witness to the entire movie thus far... a story of a boy sharing a boat with a Tiger. How the tiger kept him alive, if not through fear, being alert, giving him something to care for.

They do not buy it. It's a ridiculous story.

Pi mulls this over and tells them the same story, but instead of sharing the life boat with the tiger, and the hyena and orang-outang... he shares it with other people.

The story plays out the same as it did with the animals but with humans.

Where it was cute and funny, yet still touching when it was animals not its disturbing and upsetting when its humans, when its his mother, and when it is him. He is the tiger.

I love the stark contrast of how he tells the human story, how it is filmed. When we are with him and the tiger through the movie the visuals are spectacular. The 3-D draws you in, amazing, the colours and textures.

There is one point in the movie when Pi is looking overboard into the depths of the sea below, and the camera follows his gaze... and what of what we see. Please go see it in theatres in 3-D if not for just what we see in the depths of the ocean.

When we are with him in the hospital all we see is white. We are close up on his face as he tells the alternative story.

Yeah, I filled up.

The older Pi shows the young writer the insurance document report, and the story the two insurance men wrote down was the story we saw, Pi and the tiger.

Take from that what you will. I choose to believe that comments on how all religion is made up and it's your faith, your belief that makes it real. To you.

But you choose as a viewer which story to believe.


My sister thought the animal story that we had watched was the real one and the human one he had made up, I thought the opposite. It's up to you.



Rating - 5




Hasta Luego
-Fake Shemp-